The European edition – 2LPs (Blue and Red) with bonus tracks
“Steal and lie to get your fix”
Here’s a fantastic track from Sacred, the new album from The Obsessed. I mentioned the other day that hearing just 30 seconds of this song was enough to sell this album to me, and I’ve not been disappointed. It’s mostly built around an irresistible wind-in-the-hair Motorhead riff but the song peaks with its pounding bar-fight of a chorus. From the lyrics I gather the victim of the crushing is more likely to be a punk of the “worthless person” variety than a punk of the musical persuasion. Either way, this songs deals out a no-nonsense crushing, pure and simple… and that’s why it’s song of the week. Enjoy.
Been on a proper Dokken kick lately so here’s the ace moody rokker When Heaven Comes Down, taken from their classic second album Tooth And Nail. Don’t really need to say much about this one do I? It’s all there: epic Kashmir-esque drama, big riffs, classy and tasteful vocals from Don Dokken and a guitar solo from George Lynch that is equally classy and tasteful too (with a smidgen of widdly thrown in for good measure). Shokkenly good.
Tired of crushing your enemies, seeing them driven before you and all that? Why not let off some steam with Omen’s Be My Wench? This is top metal cobblers, it’s got a chorus that you’ll never get out of your head and it’s also got the kind of raunchy lyrics that most po-faced modern bands wouldn’t touch with a bargepole. But if you’re going to do Conan metal there needs to be some shagging in there. It’s the barbarian way.
As my Top 10 Albums of the Year proved, “death metal in space” was a big thing in 2016. So let’s travel back in time to 1990 and the album that started it all: Nocturnus’ The Key and this excellent blast of sci-fi horror. Some sort of evil cyborg has invented a time machine and set a course for the date 0 B.C. He has only one goal: kill the baby Jesus!
“Blasting away Father, Mother, and Child/laughing hysterically all of the while” the cyborg proves to be devastatingly successful in his mission. And Destroying the Manger proves devastatingly successful too: a wild shred-fest of riffs and solos that gets down to serious moshing business at 4:10. And check out the prominent keyboards too… Nocturnus going where no death metal band had gone before.
Welcome to a new feature: The HMO Song of the Week! Each Sunday I’ll be posting up the song that’s been lighting up my life the most in the past week: could be a new song or an old classic.
So let’s get this series off to the best possible start with one of the best possible songs: Virgin Steele’s Lion in Winter from their terrific album Age of Consent. It’s a fine example of their patented and thrilling barbaric romanticism. The Manowarring and galloping guitars provide the barbarism while the instrumental flourishes, melodic pomp and David DeFies’ impassioned vocals provide the romanticism. Here’s a man that can sing a line like “And I’ll rage against this wind” and sound like he really means it. Wonderful.
Glenn sees your “Dad-bod” and raises you a “Danz-bod”
The covers albums is almost always a dodgy proposition but I couldn’t help but hold out some hope for Danzig’s Skeletons. Partly because… Glenn F. Danzig! But also cause I knew the Evil Elvis was going to choose some interesting material to put through the metal wringer. And it’s the choice of material that saves Skeletons from being a total stinker. The performances are pretty ropey: flat vocals, lifeless drums and relentless guitar squealies along with a flabby sound that’s devoid of dynamics. There are dicey renditions of Sabbath’s N.I.B, Aerosmith’s Lord of the Thighs and ZZ Top’s Rough Boy, while a surprising choice, sounds like your drunken Dad commandeering the microphone at a wedding. Dad, stop! But Danzig gets bonus points for doing all these tracks his own way and, when you’ve got Glenn M. F. Danzig doing The Everly Brothers’ Crying in the Rain, it’s hard not to get a kick out of that… however much it sounds like the karaoke of your darkest fears. It’s worth having Skeletons just for that and its opening trio of tunes: Dave Allan and the Arrows’ Devil’s Angels is bashed out in delightfully Misfits-y style; the obscure soundtrack curio Satan (Theme from Satan’s Sadists) is brilliant and tailor-made for Glenn – “I was born mean, by the time I was 12 I was killing, killing for Satan”; and his cover of Elvis’ Let Yourself Go is a stomping taster for his planned Elvis EP. It’s definitely for fans-only but, for them, it’s a flawed-but-loveable glimpse into the great Fonzig’s interesting and eclectic influences. And if you’re not singing “I was borrrrn mean…” in the shower every day after hearing this, you’re a better man than me.
Wrrrow! Look out! Eeee eeee… From the top of the mountain, yeah! Yow! Fire! Owww. Ruff. Oooh… Look out! Rowf! Yeah! Oooh yeah!
And so David DeFeis kicks off Virgin Steele’s 13th album The Black Light Bacchanalia with every vocal exclamation known to man.
He sounds excited and so he should: the opening track By the Hammer of Zeus (and the Wrecking Ball of Thor) is pure awesomeness. It delivers on the promise of its ridiculously mighty title. I’ve become obsessed with this song and have been listening to it thrice daily for many moons now. Ruff!
From the top of the mountain, yeah!
Unfortunately, the rest of the album isn’t as instantly appealing . Exclamations aside, DeFeis spends most of The Black Light Bacchanalia singing in an oddly soft voice. It’s an interesting experiment, making it seem like he’s whispering sweet nothings into your ear or he’s inside your head. Look out! But it doesn’t do much for the album’s dynamics, especially when many of the songs are meandering and forgettable.
But my hopeless addiction to that opening track keeps me coming back for more and moments of greatness keeping popping out with each listen. Weirdly, considering the laid-back vocals on the heavier tracks, DeFeis sings the excellent piano-ballad The Tortures of the Damned with raging passion. Fire! And the softer vocal approach works dreamily on To Crown Them With Halos (Parts 1 & 2) and Necropolis (He Answers Them With Death), bringing out all the drama and the melody. I’m finding that there’s nothing in my collection quite like this so I’m seduced into giving it another spin. It’s flawed but fascinating. And even if it doesn’t quite live up to its exclamatory opening there’s still plenty to get excited about here. Ooohh yeah!
Do you ever want to write about or review an album and just feel unequal to the task? I feel that way about The Dictators Go Girl Crazy! The New Yorkers’ 1975 debut album has got so much going on. It was a critical success and commercial failure and manages to be classic and overlooked at the same time.
I’m not really comfortable talking about its supposed punk influence either, given I’m not a big punk fan. This always just sounded like fun, back-to-basics rock n’ roll to me: Louie Louie riffs, The Who and The Beach Boys with teenage, street level attitude and a ton of pop culture references thrown in. It’s an album that I love but I’m reluctant to recommend. Especially if, like me, you came at this from a Manowar direction and want to hear where guitarist Ross the Boss started out. After hearing the lamentable cover of I Got You Babe and the silly Back to Africa you’re going to wonder what the hell is going on. (Anyone reading this for Manoreasons should probably check out The Dictators’ third album Bloodbrothers first. It’s quality muscle rock!)
But from the “let’s go” of the fourth track Master Race Rock on, this album is a veritable blast. Two Tub Man, (I Live For) Cars and Girls and Weekend all put such a joyous spring in your step that you wish every rock album was like this. It’s so quirky, arch and fresh. The occasional vocal interjections of “secret weapon” Handsome Dick Manitoba add to the fun too. The album’s second side is so perfect it makes you forget the first one ever happened.
And… Ross the Boss. Fingers and steel, baby! The man is a legend.
So, like I said. I’m not equal to the task of covering this great and weird album. But never mind… with my financial holdings I could be basking in the sun in Florida. This music-writing lark is just a hobby for me! Nothing, ya hear? A HOBBY!
The animals are all insane… and badly dressed. God help us.
Normally I would base a review of an album on more than three listens but after listening to W.A.S.P’s Inside the Electric Circus that many times this week, I’ve heard enough. The first three proper tracks on it (the title track, I Don’t Need No Doctor and 95-N.A.S.T.Y.) are the only ones worth writing home about. Fantastic howling, raunchy metal that makes you feel like this could be one of the most fun metal albums ever. The problem is, the rest of this album is mundane. It doesn’t do anything wrong exactly: this is no “hope you like our new direction” misfire. I love what W.A.S.P. did with their first two albums and this continues in that vein but it’s the sound of a band on autopilot. W.A.S.P. knew it too. After the supporting tour and live album (guess which songs from this made it onto that?) they changed tack, releasing the more serious and ambitious The Headless Children. If further proof of Inside the Electric Circus‘ mediocrity is needed: that cover. If you paid money to see an “Electric Circus” and got a dude in a cage wearing a tiger-print leotard and fake claws… you’d ask for a refund. Demand better.
It’s very exciting to have new music from Armored Saint. There’s a great deal of chemistry and talent in the ranks and John Bush’s superior voice is always a draw. I’d like to see them do well and get the credit they deserve and, with their seventh album Win Hands Down, they seem to be getting some long overdue sales and recognition.
Initial spins were very exciting. There’s a real feeling of Rock history running through the whole thing. There are hints of Thrash, Alternative, burly Classic Rock groove and inventive Prog Rock twists and turns. The variation adding exciting colour to the band’s time-honoured muscular, melodic Metal. It’s the sound of a vintage band aging well. Win Hands Down opens the album with one of their best songs to date, a superb driving Rocker. And Mess is steely, massive and skilfully arranged. Armored Saint sound like they’re giving it their all. John Bush, in particular, is on peak form. No mean feat considering his track record.
But the Saints don’t totally conquer. The album hits a lull in its second half. With A Full Head of Steam and In An Instant are both curiously forgettable and the sultry Dive, although good, isn’t the kind of song to set things back on track. Some of the better songs are hobbled by weak lyrics too. They’re aiming for the raconteur character of lyricists like Lynott or Mogg but they don’t have the same skill or personality and end up hitting out with clumsy, cringe-inducing lines like “I even gave you your own unique rriinngg” and “He never killed anyone but he hurt somebody’s feelings once”. Even Bush’s can-sing-the-phone-book voice can’t save songs from clunkers like that.
Mah copy
Ultimately Win Hands Down is solid and well-performed but forgettable. If you don’t mind the wise-cracking lyrical personality of the album you might find plenty to enjoy here but it fails to connect emotionally with me. With repeat listens I’ve found myself losing interest in the album which is a shame as a few songs find the band at their very best. Plenty of people seem to be enjoying it more than me so I’m pleased for the band and their success. I just wish I had been more won over by it. Hopefully they can deliver something more up my street next time.
HEAVY METAL OVERLOAD 